Travel as the masses do: all-inclusive Greece getaway…

18th-25th June 2019

Low on funds – I haven’t worked a day since taking leave from the world of gainful employment last September – these days I travel on a heavily restricted budget.  Fortunately, it doesn’t mean that travel is totally impossible, it is more a case of ‘adapting expectations’… 

I have toyed with the idea of trying out Couchsurfing, a scheme that attracted a rather negative response from my daughter. 

‘Mother, really…  Couchsurfing???  Do you know what Couchsurfing is all about??’ 

I do, as a matter of fact, and clearly possess a rather more trusting view of human nature, but it has to be said… she has a point, there are always risks, although some of my more memorable evenings of late have been with Airbnb hosts. And for me the joy of travelling is as much about meeting inspirational and interesting people, as it is about conquering soaring mountains..

I have momentarily shelved the thought of exploring a few corners of Europe overland, a-la-‘Race Around The World’: making things up on the cheap as you go along, finding bed and board with hospitable strangers, munching street food, or using overnight trains and buses to save on accommodation cost.  As these days budget airlines service every corner of Europe, there is no competition, and I reluctantly exchange adventure for convenience and economy… At least my daughter will sleep more soundly…

With very few commitments on the horizon, I can take advantage of the glut of amazingly cheap last-minute deals flooding the internet.  It is still June, just outside holiday peak season and fantastic pickings at rock-bottom prices plentiful.  Greece it is!! Halkidiki.  4-star. All-inclusive. For one whole week.  It’s the kind of holiday I haven’t subjected myself to for a long time, the kind of non-adventure beach-bum holiday that only requires a bikini, a towel and lots of sunscreen.   And, of course a book or two to stimulate the mind, because to be honest not much else will be stimulated whilst I’m lying comatose on a sunbed for the best part of the day.  It is not my kind of holiday, but needs must!!  It’s a hard life but I can do it if I have to…

Of course, some things are too good to be true, and rock bottom prices for classy hotels surely come with some hidden surprises…  So it was that two days after booking the holiday I took a closer look at the small print next to the glossy picture of the stylish rooms we could expect to lounge in.  With just a mere ten days to our departure, the hotel was in the midst of renovation work with the grand opening scheduled two days before our arrival.  I sighed at the prospect of noisy building work drowning out noisy music.  With any luck we should be just ahead of noisy children in the swimming pool.  But hey-ho, what else to expect from a cheapy get-away, at least the sun would be guaranteed…

A Ryan Air flight from Stansted to Thessaloniki added its own challenges.  The bikini, towel and sunscreen essentials I had envisaged stuffing in my smallish backpack quickly grew into a more substantial pile, including my laptop…  I know, why take a laptop on holiday!! Before booking the package holiday I had discussed the luggage issue with Simon who, at a loose end and in need of a break from the tedium of life, gallantly agreed to accompany me on this trip. 

‘Let’s just pay for at least one suitcase in the hold.  Much cheaper than adding it on later…,’ I had suggested.

But men being men, he’d been convinced his small carry-on case would fit the bill, and to be honest it didn’t exceed the allowed dimensions at all… I, on the other hand, bought myself a little space in the underbelly of the aeroplane to accommodate my slightly oversized carry-on bag so I could keep my precious laptop safely in view on the plane.

Queuing to board, some unease started brewing as passengers were divided into two distinct groups: priority boarding and non-priority boarding.  Penny-pinchers as we were, we had refused to fork out for getting on the plane before everyone else…  Who on earth bothers??  It appears: everyone else…  and with paying the priority premium came the added bonus of actually being allowed to take your carry-on luggage inside the plane.  Size restrictions were of no consequence for the likes of us who hadn’t read the small print.  My bag was OK, because it was a soft, small backpack… A new Ryan Air policy of hidden charges to fool those who do not regularly fly Ryan Air.  Poor Simon had to pay up.  No way was his little solid case allowed on the plane with him; in the hold it must go at an additional cost of £25 for the outward leg.  It made my £12 paid online when checking in seem a real bargain…  And we would have to pay the same again if we wanted to bring our luggage with us on the home stretch.  But hey, it’s a holiday… Smile and lesson learnt.

We arrived in Greece just before midnight. Our body clocks still on UK time, it felt early.  We piled into the waiting van to be transferred to our hotel and, A.C. on full blast, set off into the pitch-dark Greek countryside.  After an hour we swept up the drive of our newly refurbished hotel.  The grounds looked immaculate, the pool inviting, the reception desk bare and unmanned…  Hello, were they not expecting us??  

It took a while for a confused and befuddled staff member to appear and an animated conversation with our Greek tour chaperone ensued.  Of course, Greek not being a language that is commonly studied, we had to wait until the end of the debate to get the low-down.  The hotel was not ready, hadn’t we been told?? No A.C., dust everywhere.  But no panic, another hotel had been arranged for us, at least for tonight.   Suitcases reloaded, we clambered back on board, this time full of trepidation rather than anticipation… 

We needn’t have worried.  The next hotel had been awaiting our arrival.  With rooms allocated in a jiffy and a barman still on duty well past midnight, the holiday was back on track as we all took a ‘let’s wait and see’ approach… Maybe this hotel would do, no one really fancied spending a week hotel-hopping… A smelly room aside – which was remedied the next morning with new plumbing in the en-suite bathroom – the ‘new’ hotel turned out a winner.  Two awesome swimming pools inside the complex and a balmy sea a mere two-minute amble through an olive tree lined path away, we were in seaside and holiday nirvana… 

And the food!!! To die for! My only previous experiences of ‘all-inclusive’ dated back some years and centred around three-star hotels where food monotony reigned.  Not in our hotel.  Variety and quality!! Just not very Greek, more catering to the tastes of a less adventurous clientele and children.  Still, in amongst the pasta, rice, fries and sausages a few gems: crumbly feta, succulent dolmades and stuffed peppers, fillet steak and salmon sides, freshly caught local fish and seafood, and of course, moussaka and souvlaki.  

But it paid to get to the restaurant ahead of the masses, before other guests – predominantly hailing from the Balkan region with a dribble of Polish and Russian tourists – descended and heaped plates with starters, main courses, desserts, cheese and fruit all at once…  Gluttony galore.  Tables laden with food for a week to be devoured by a twosome as if there would be no tomorrow.  And the leftovers, of which there were plenty, destined for the bin.  Such a waste…  In all honesty, I ate far too much too, unable to resist temptation, but in good old-fashion only took what I could comfortably consume before leaving the table.. 

Breakfast for two…

Excursions proved more challenging.  Not having a car at our disposal, and balking at the prices of renting one, we were at the mercy of taxis ferrying us to various starting points.  Not a viable option either as often the taxi fare alone exceeded the cost of the trip we had in mind.  So, instead we devoured books, bobbed on the waves on sea kayaks and car-shaped pedalos, spent a lot of time in the pool and in the evening, when the heat had abated, hiked to nearby sunset spots as Greek life passed us by…

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On our last day, we treated ourselves to a little bit of the real Greece though… (to be continued)